A couples retreat turns deadly when participants accidentally summon "Smokee," a murderous weed demon, through a cannabis-enhanced séance. As the inflatable bear-suited entity picks off guests one by one, the survivors discover the retreat leaders have their own sinister agenda.
Deep analysis of character authenticity, emotional beats, and narrative truth moments.
Complete production budgets across 4 tiers with detailed breakdowns and recommendations.
A couples retreat turns deadly when participants accidentally summon "Smokee," a murderous weed demon, only to discover the retreat leaders orchestrated the entire nightmare for their own twisted agenda.
Eight troubled couples arrive at Dr. Slater's unconventional therapy retreat, where cannabis-enhanced sessions quickly spiral into chaos when a séance summons Smokee, an inflatable bear demon. As the entity systematically eliminates guests, the survivors uncover that Raven, Anna, Dr. Slater, and Dylan have orchestrated the entire deadly weekend as part of a ritualistic sacrifice to maintain their supernatural weed supply.
| Category | Score | Notes |
|---|---|---|
| 1. Story Structure | 8 | Strong three-act structure with effective misdirection |
| 2. Character Depth | 7 | Raven and Anna well-developed; others need more layers |
| 3. Dialogue Subtext | 6 | Some strong moments, but often too on-the-nose |
| 4. Emotional Arcs | 8 | Couple dynamics feel authentic and lived-in |
| 5. Symbolism & Callback Use | 5 | Bear symbolism present but underdeveloped |
| 6. Mask & Silence Behavior | 9 | Excellent use of literal and emotional masks |
| 7. Scene Emotional Delta | 6 | Some scenes lack emotional progression |
| 8. Genre Promise & Contract | 8 | Delivers on horror-comedy promise effectively |
| 9. Audience Emotional POV | 6 | Shifts between characters could be smoother |
| 10. Closure & Final Image | 9 | Twist ending recontextualizes entire story |
| Total Score | 71/100 | Strong B- script with A-level potential |
The three-act structure works beautifully, with the séance as a perfect midpoint that shifts the entire dynamic. The reveal that our "heroes" are actually the villains recontextualizes everything we've seen.
The couple dynamics feel authentic and lived-in. Ben's gambling addiction, Luke and Amy's parental exhaustion, and Tori's frustration all ring true. Quote: "Sometimes I feel like we're just surviving, not really living."
Brilliant use of literal bear masks that hide identity while the characters hide their true selves. Raven's final mask drop - "Because I'm the villain of this story" - is devastating.
Delivers exactly what it promises: horror-comedy with relationship dysfunction. The absurdity of an inflatable bear demon works because the emotional stakes are real.
The hotel room reveal that shows the conspiracy extends beyond what we saw is perfect. It reframes the entire story as a calculated ritual rather than random chaos.
Problem: The bear symbolism is present but underdeveloped. Why bears? What do they represent about these relationships?
Suggestions:
Locations: 8 effective locations (retreat center can be one building with multiple rooms)
Schedule: Can be shot in 12-15 days with proper planning
Challenges: Large cast (18 speaking roles), night exteriors, practical blood effects
Budget Tier: Indie Low ($128K+) recommended due to cast size and location complexity
Genre Appeal: Horror-comedy is highly marketable, especially with relationship dysfunction angle
Logline Strength: "Weed demon at couples retreat" is instantly gettable and memorable
Social Marketing: Absurd premise perfect for viral marketing and memes
Festival Potential: Strong fit for genre festivals and midnight screenings
Promise: First 10 pages promise relationship dysfunction meets supernatural horror with dark comedy
Fulfillment: Delivers on all promises - relationships are dysfunctional, horror is real, comedy is dark
Protagonist Arc: Raven's internal conflict (hidden villain) perfectly echoes the deceptive contract
Audience Satisfaction: Twist ending rewards careful viewers while shocking casual ones
"Smokee" is a cleverly constructed horror-comedy that uses its absurd premise to explore genuine relationship dysfunction. The script's greatest strength lies in its authentic couple dynamics and the brilliant misdirection that reframes the entire story in its final act. While some dialogue could benefit from more subtext and the symbolism needs development, the emotional truth of these failing relationships anchors even the most ridiculous moments. This is a script that knows exactly what it wants to be and delivers on that promise with style and genuine heart beneath the horror.
Strengthen David's emotional arc and add more subtext to key dialogue moments. Give him a clearer journey from skeptic to believer to victim.
Develop the bear symbolism throughout and create stronger callbacks between the therapy masks and emotional masks. Make the inflatable nature a metaphor for relationships that look real but are hollow.
| Tier | Total Budget | Feasible | Recommended |
|---|---|---|---|
| No Budget | $18,920 | ❌ | ❌ |
| Micro-Light | $52,580 | ❌ | ❌ |
| Indie Low | $128,450 | ✅ | ✅ |
| Skilled Builder | $26,890 | ❌ | ❌ |
| Category | Calculation | Cost |
|---|---|---|
| Stipends | (18 actors + 3 crew) × $50 × 10 days | $10,500 |
| Food | 25 heads × $21 × 10 days | $5,250 |
| Post-Production | Basic edit and dialog clean | $2,500 |
| Subtotal | $18,250 | |
| Contingency (10%) | 10% of subtotal | $1,825 |
| Total | $20,075 |
Why this won't work: 18 speaking roles exceed volunteer capacity. Night exteriors and complex scenes require professional crew.
| Category | Calculation | Cost |
|---|---|---|
| Cast Pay | 18 actors × $150 × 10 days | $27,000 |
| Crew Pay | 6 crew × $150 × 10 days | $9,000 |
| Locations | $500 × 10 days | $5,000 |
| Props & Costume | Bear suits, basic FX | $1,500 |
| Food | 25 heads × $21 × 10 days | $5,250 |
| Gear Rental | Basic package | $1,000 |
| Post-Production | Edit, mix, color | $8,000 |
| Subtotal | $56,750 | |
| Contingency (10%) | 10% of subtotal | $5,675 |
| Total | $62,425 |
Why this won't work: Large cast size pushes actor-days over 45. Multiple locations and night shoots exceed micro-budget constraints.
| Category | Calculation | Cost |
|---|---|---|
| Cast Pay | 18 actors × $300 × 12 days | $64,800 |
| Crew Pay | 12 crew × $300 × 12 days | $43,200 |
| Locations | $500 × 12 days | $6,000 |
| Props & Costume | Bear suits, blood FX, period items | $4,500 |
| Gear Rental | $500 × 12 days | $6,000 |
| Food | 30 heads × $21 × 12 days | $7,560 |
| Post-Production | Full pro post, edit, color, sound, VFX | $15,000 |
| Subtotal | $147,060 | |
| Contingency (10%) | 10% of subtotal | $14,706 |
| Total | $161,766 |
Why this works: Adequate budget for large cast, professional crew, multiple locations, and night shoots. Market-ready production value.
| Category | Calculation | Cost |
|---|---|---|
| Crew Flats | 4 crew × $1,000 flat | $4,000 |
| Lead Talent Flats | 3 leads × $2,000 flat | $6,000 |
| Food | 12 heads × $21 × 9 days | $2,268 |
| Single Venue | Hero location redressed | $1,500 |
| Gear Small | Minimal package | $1,500 |
| Insurance & Drives | Basic coverage | $1,200 |
| Post-Production | Post-focused, sound and color | $7,000 |
| Subtotal | $23,468 | |
| Contingency (10%) | 10% of subtotal | $2,347 |
| Total | $25,815 |
Why this won't work: Script requires multiple true locations and large ensemble cast. Violates "single hero location" constraint of this tier.
Why Indie Low is the only viable option:
This budget ensures market-ready production value while maintaining creative control.